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[Podfic] The Next Life by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
07 Jul 2026
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Summary
“I don’t need an exorcism,” Tim says.
“I beg to bloody differ,” Constantine mutters.
Nobly, Tim elects to ignore him. “I want you to teach me.”
“Teach you what? Manners?”
“I already know manners,” Tim says, then barrels on as Constantine snorts in disagreement, “what I need to learn is necromancy.”
Podfic of The Next Life by spqr.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 7
- Hits:
- 68
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[Podfic] I Learned To Drown Young by GLeoPods (GracefulLeopard), PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
03 Jul 2026
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Summary
“I’m kinda fucked either way, if the pit's wearing off.”
No. No, he’s not, because Dick refuses to let him go.
“I’ll kill Ra’s Al Ghul myself if I need to,” Dick says, and means it with every fiber of his being, “I’m not letting you die again.”
Jason watches him carefully, like Dick is a porcelain vase about to topple. “The Pit didn’t revive me,” he says slowly. “You know that. I won’t die if it wears off.”
“You’re just going to take this?” He demands, pushing himself fully upright and staring Jason down, disbelief warring with his fury. ”You, Jason fucking Todd, are going to lie down and let yourself fade away? Just like that?”
OR:
The effects of the Lazarus Pit are wearing off.
Jason didn't want any of the Bats to know he was deteriorating, especially not Dick. But now that he does, nothing can stop Dick from trying to heal his brother.Except, maybe Jason is saving Dick as much as Dick is saving Jason.
Podfic of I Learned To Drown Young
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come out feeling like hope by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Nightwing (Comics)
02 Jul 2026
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Summary
Dick fucking Grayson sure has a way of derailing all of Jason’s plans, that’s for sure.
He was expecting to find something different. An exhausted Nightwing leading city repair and rescue efforts, clearly overworked. A stressed and worried older brother, concerned about his little brother’s injuries from the big bad Red Hood. Even something related to Jason being the Red Hood, whether it was pissed or confused or whatever. Not–
Not this. Not a bundled up lump of man with unwashed hair and empty eyes lying on the bed in a messy hotel room, talking about having seen Jason before (despite Jason knowing he hasn’t) and implying that Jason is going to take him to die.
OR:
Red Hood comes looking for Nightwing. Jason Todd doesn't like what he finds.
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[Podfic] No Strings Attached by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
01 Jul 2026
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Summary
"Who can I go to for the sake of righting the Jin sect’s wrongs, Senior Lan? There’s no one, and that’s why I fled to the Burial Mounds.”
“All the same,” Lan Qiren says, looking around at the dank cave and then at the child nodding towards sleep in Wei Wuxian’s lap, “you can hardly stay here, Wei Wuxian. I saw that your people were trying to farm on the slope behind the forest, but I doubt their efforts will bear fruit. What will you eat?”
“When people are hungry enough,” Wei Wuxian says distantly, “they will eat anything.”
__After Wei Wuxian's flight from the camp at Qiongqi Dao, Lan Qiren visits the Burial Mounds and discovers that he has bigger problems than his nephew's broken heart.
Naturally, this changes things.
Podfic of No Strings Attached by stiltonbasket.
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[Podfic] From a Secret Admirer, With Love (Alternatively: Mission: Court Lan Sizhui) by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic) for Lemurienne
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
23 Jun 2026
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Summary
In which Zizhen, Jin Ling, and Jingyi get together and decide to court Sizhui. It goes terribly.
Podfic of From a Secret Admirer, With Love (Alternatively: Mission: Court Lan Sizhui) by owlfowlfa.
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get loved, idiot by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic for Lemurienne
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
23 Jun 2026
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Summary
"Are you behind all of this?" Wei Wuxian asks, unable to keep the question inside.
Sizhui blinks placidly at him, hands politely settled in his lap. "Behind what, baba?" he asks innocently.
"Everyone being–weird," Wei Wuxian says, feeling both embarassed and a little defensive, "calling me things."
"Perhaps baba is simply noticing how much people appreciate him," Sizhui answers, then reaches for his chopsticks.
--
OR: people start to use terms of affection on Wei Wuxian. He is not prepared.
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[Podfic] The Wire Mother by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic) for nopaintjustpain
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Project Hail Mary (2026)
22 Jun 2026
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Summary
I lived with this hunger long before the Hail Mary. This is nothing new. I’m fine.
Right up until Rocky asks another question.
“When last time you touch other human person skin, question?”
Oh. Oh no. “When I… a few days after I first woke up here.”
Rocky starts to relax for a split second, but then tightens when something occurs to him.
“Grace crewmates dead when you wake up. You said this, statement. You not even know your own name, remember nothing, see dead bodies, confirm?”
I nod, because if I open my mouth I will gag.
“When last time Grace touch ALIVE human person, question.”
I swallow thickly. I don’t answer aloud because I know Rocky can hear the hitch in my breath. My stomach churns with fresh bile. He senses my vital signs tick over into stress patterns and goes very, very still again.
“Grace. When last time, question.”
I clench my jaw so hard my temples ache, and beg him with my eyes to just stop.
“Grace. Please say not when… when Evil Stratt humans put you to sleep.”
I can taste grass.
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AKA: Grace starves for more than just food on the journey to Erid.
Podfic of The Wire Mother by nopaintjustpain
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[Podfic] wrong number by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic) for aalesu
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
22 Jun 2026
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Summary
There’s a few rings, then the phone picks up.
“Wayne Residence.”
That’s funny, Tim thinks, Mrs. Mac doesn’t sound like herself.
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On a hot July evening while home alone, eight-year-old Tim gets a fever. He means to ask Mrs. Mac for help — but ends up accidentally calling Alfred Pennyworth. Somehow, even in sickness, he wins all the hearts of the Wayne family in one fell swoop.Podfic of wrong number by adelfie.
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please let the devil in by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
15 Jun 2026
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Summary
It's too late for the running humans, though. Phoenix can catch up easily, finally breaking through the rubble into the small opening.
Except. It would have to leave Nightwing.
For a moment it hesitates–it really wants to chase, to play, today has been so boring. But. Nightwing. Ally. Needs its help.
It goes to the same opening the humans went through and peers inside.
Nightwing manages a ‘Hello,’ but just barely. The not-cryptid sounds tired. Wheezy. Not good. Underneath the disguise, Nightwing is just a person, and people die so easily.
It would know.
OR:
Phoenix rescues a bird. Dick realizes just how much Phoenix knows about the Bats. There are hair pets.Series
- Part 2 of came back cryptid
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Tags
Summary
Grace didn't have much of anything these days. Less appetite, less strength, less of whatever it was that made a person reach for a disgusting coma food slurry bag and drink it down because it was necessary to live and do it all over again tomorrow because tomorrow existed and had things in it worth being alive for.
Or - Grace's mental health deteriorates on the journey to Erid.
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[Podfic] Honesty by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
13 Jun 2026
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Summary
“Maybe we could just – not talk. Until the effect wears off.”
“It shouldn’t be that hard,” Lan Xichen said encouragingly. “Given that it’s us.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Nie Mingjue asked suspiciously.
“Well, it’s not like the three of us ever talk anymore,” he said, and then slapped his hand over his mouth.
Jin Guangyao could not wait for the truth-compelling effects of the smoke to wear off.
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[Podfic] The Birds and The Bees (and The Bunnies) by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
12 Jun 2026
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Summary
Jiang Cheng set his glass down with a thump that shook the table, making the other glasses tinkle musically. He was getting that horrible, pinched look around his eyes that was usually only caused by day long meetings with Sect Leader Yao. "Look, A-Ling. The thing with sex is..."
Jin Ling leaned forward just a little, not wanting to miss a word.
He watched his fearless uncle who loved him square his shoulders and face the demon of Jin Ling's curiosity.
"The thing is..."
And completely lose his nerve. Jiang Cheng's shoulders slumped minutely and his scowl was back in full force as he turned to Jin Ling. "If you have sex, you will get pregnant and die."
Three times someone tried to give Jin Ling The Talk and one time they succeeded.Podfic of The Birds and The Bees (and The Bunnies) by Beltenebra.
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Tripod Grace by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
Grace pushes himself back from the micro-scope, a movement he has done many many times before without any problems. This time, though, his clumsiness makes him fall back.
Generally, Grace is okay at catching himself. Most of the time he tries to pretend he didn’t trip, or simply yells “I’m fine!” after he straightens up.
Grace doesn’t catch himself. He falls, and his body hits the ground, and Rocky hears horrible, terrible snaps.
Grace’s body is not supposed to make those noises. They are breaking noises.
OR:
On the way to Erid, Grace takes a tumble and breaks something. Rocky has a bad time.
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[podfic] Here With Me by iamwish by daisydiversions, daisydiversions_events (daisydiversions), EchoandtheVaskians, Faeriel_LovesCats, Gavilan_collabs (Gavilan), jennisais-pods (jennisaisquoi), KeriArentikaiOddpods (KeriArentikai), kisahawklin, LadyEn, LadyEn_Multipods (LadyEn), OtterlyChrys, PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic), the voice of the radish (I_D_Clare)
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
31 May 2026
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Summary
Wen Qing finds him on the roof of where he’s been staying, nursing a jar of Sishu’s wine.
“Wei Wuxian! What are you doing up there?”
Wei Wuxian hasn’t had nearly enough wine to get tipsy, let alone drunk enough for his words to slur, but he slurs them anyway for nostalgia. “What if Lan Zhan doesn’t fall in love with me?”
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Wei Wuxian finds himself in the past, a few months before the Gusu Lan lectures, and decides that his best shot athiding his traumafixing the future is faking his own kidnapping and asking Wen Qing who all he needs to kill before she or someone she trusts is in charge of QishanWen. Clearly, he thought this through.Or: Wei Wuxian creates a No War!AU, and then he has to live in it.
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[Podfic] cards on the table by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic) for GracefulLeopard
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
25 May 2026
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Summary
Tim's parents faked their deaths and fled the country years ago, but neglected to take him with them. He spent some time on the streets, and now at 16, he makes a living as a fortune teller, stalking and hustling the shit out of Gotham's elite by telling them eerily accurate fortunes based on the information he gathers about them.
His life is peculiar but he wouldn't change a thing. When he gets booked for the big Wayne Halloween party, however, he finds himself getting all tangled up with the Waynes, and the more fortunes he tells, the tighter the snare becomes.or: Tim just wanted to scam Gotham's elite, not end up on the Batfamily's watchlist. But it seems they just won't leave him alone..
Podfic of cards on the table by wesslan.
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[Podfic] Three Guys Go to a Bar(and then they Beat You With It) by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic) for Oceanbreeze7
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
23 May 2026
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Summary
“Well, it seems a bit funny…” Shinsou’s drawling voice trailed off, becoming slightly sharper by the word, “...that the three students with the most villainous quirks were set up for this.”
Tokoyami jerked upright. “You do not mean that-.”
“Oh he means it,” Bakugou growled out with narrowed eyes, “ pencil-ass set us up to play his goddamn villains because we’re good at it.”
Or:
Aizawa assigned Tokoyami, Bakugou, and Shinsou to play as the villains in the end year exam against the rest of the class.
Aizawa accounted for Bakugou's rage, Shinsou's asshole tendencies, and Tokoyami's self-esteem.
Aizawa did not account for the pure, unholy wrath, of three very petty teenagers who like to make a point.Podfic of Three Guys Go to a Bar(and then they Beat You With It) by Oceanbreeze7.
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[Podfic] Theories on a Probably Dead Boy by PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
16 May 2026
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Summary
On September 27th, 2014, an unknown boy wearing expensive clothing and only able to say one name was brought to the ER after being hit by a car. He disappeared overnight. Who was he?
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an r/UnresolvedMysteries post on that time Jason came back to life
Podfic of Theories on a Probably Dead Boy by dottie_dc (dottie_wan_kenobi).
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[Podfic] turn the lights off by GLeoPods (GracefulLeopard), PPan Pods (PolynomialPandemic)
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
14 May 2026
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Summary
One of Bruce’s many cars pulls up, and Jason waves goodbye to the secretary, opens the door and sits, starting to ask, “So, why’d you pull me out, A?”
For a few seconds, there isn’t a response. Then, an unfamiliar voice replies; “To give you the opportunity of saving his life.”
Jason’s already reaching for the doorhandle, ready to open the door and–
“If you run, Alfred Pennyworth will die.”
That stops him in his tracks. Slowly, Jason turns his head to look at the driver.
“Buckle your seatbelt, Robin,” the Red Hood says.
OR:
Tim Drake died a hero, one whose shoes Jason can't possibly fill.
Unrelatedly, the Red Hood is in town. He's got a robin to steal, two bats to kill, and luckily, a lot of time to spend with his kidnappee.
[reverse robins]
Podfic of turn the lights off by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic.
Series
- Part 6 of turn the lights off
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Summary
"I don't ask him to murder."
"Yet."
"I won't. I'll bloody my hands a thousand times before I ask him to pick up a knife."
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Or:
Jason never would have come back to Gotham- but Damian needed somewhere to run. Now that he's home, he's determined to make this city a safer place for his kid to live.
If only the bats would get the message to leave them alone.
Series
- Part 2 of Little League AU
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nine lives, cat's eyes by GracefulLeopard, PolynomialPandemic
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
09 May 2026
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Summary
Dick may or may not be seeking out a cryptid.
As a local cryptid himself, he feels like this is a perfectly normal thing to do. Ignoring the fact that he's a fake cryptid–for all he knows, they're also faking–it makes sense for them to get to know each other!
And, of course, there's the fact that this possible-creature-maybe-human scared his baby brother.
Dick just wants to talk, honest.
OR:
Jason Todd is dead. Phoenix rises from the ashes.
The Bats just want to know who (what) the hell it is.Series
- Part 1 of came back cryptid
